Written Nov 2nd.
Researching the timeline of sobering up feels pretty good. I’m noticing feeling and looking a bit better. Counting days also feels good because even though it hasn’t been tough not to drink yet it still feels like leveling up. I watched an interview with a skateboarder who is a recovering addict and he said he sometimes stays up til midnight just to watch the sobriety day-counter on his phone click over. Instead of just ‘trying not to drink as much this week’ it feels good to think I’m into a project and I’ve got 3 days of work done.
This is all of course still pretty standard pie-eyed enthusiasm for me, I enjoy everything I start before it gets difficult or doesn’t go the way I want. We’ll see what happens when I get defeatist and nihilistic and haven’t had a drink in two weeks and I feel baseline healthy.
Not doing these posts live is cool for me too, it feels more like working on a novel than just keeping people I don’t talk to often informed on a situation that is unfolding in, hopefully, an utterly mundane way.